I'm at my softball game this week and one of the guys on the team brought his little girl to the game. She's cute as a button, probably 4-5 years old and she spends the game playing in the dirt just outside the dugout. About halfway through the game, I get up to go out in the field and notice she's playing with a cup. If only this were a Dixie cup or a Solo cup, I would not be writing right now. It was her father's protective cup. For those seeking further clarity, let's just say it's the safe for the family jewels. I didn't know whether to call HRS or Toys for Tots. I'd like to think it was clean, but it's not really something you run through the permanent-press cycle. Pity the Santa who has this little girl on his lap when she whispers in his ear, "All I really want this year is a jockstrap." Isn't this why we have "Happy Meals"?
About Me
- Life is Heald
- Naples, Florida
- I like to laugh. If you don't, please hit whatever button escorts you from the premises immediately. I write a humor column for the Naples Daily News called, get this, "Life is Heald." It's about life as we all see it, just from a pair of rose-colored glasses that need cleaning. I tell stories, I rant about things that drive us all to the point of filling out a gun permit, I make fun of you and I make fun of me. If I can't use it in the column for whatever reason, it ends up here. Sometimes, you'll need to read the column to know what I'm writing about, but often the posts are just random, drive-by thoughts that entered my brain and exited my fingers. Just a flesh wound, so don't go dialing 911 about anything you read here. This is not one of those blogs that will tell you how many prunes it took to jump start my last bowel movement or what grade the kid got on his math test. The good stuff, I save for the Christmas newsletter.
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